I dont like rain? No. I hate it.

I dont like the rainy season.

You can take me to all the fantasy series where I would realize the importance of rain and it wouldn't change how I feel.

I just dont like it.

I accept that we need it. Very much I know. And I dont mean otherwise.

But I still dont like it.

Imagine, you're going to this very-big-your-life-depends-on-it job interview, slept well, woke up early, had a 2-hour bath, wearing the best formal suit you could get your hands with, and that well-shined shoes. Then it rained.

You now need to walk real slow because you might get your feet wet from all the puddles and rain splashes. You also need to take your not-so-fashionable umbrella which really ruins your outfit.

Instead of taking the bus, you now need to take a cab to the office because of the rain-wet people coming in and out of the bus.

You will then have to call the office apologizing because you will arrive later than expected due to the heavy traffic. (Which, by the way, is a very bad impression.. and first impression lasts..)

After the interview, you can choose whether let the rain subside before going home, (which I think is a better idea although if we are talking about storms it would take hours..) or you can fight your way through the rain, may encounter a few flooded areas, survive some traffic jams and arrive home looking all wasted.


Ok. Im talking extremes. But can't anyone understand how frightening the sound of heavy rains on the roof is?

I am afraid of the rain. Honest. My hubby thinks its something funny. Everytime it rains he teases me about it, though it usually comes with a tight embrace and a kiss. (That really helps ease me out.)

I'm serious. The start of the rain triggers me to crawl up in bed and hide under my pillows, or the bedsheets or anything that can cover me from the rain.

My mom told me I was afraid of the rain since I was little. My children are afraid of the rain as well. I dont know if its hereditary. Its quite a moment when you see the three of us trying to get comfort from each other because we are all afraid the rain will cause something bad to happen.

Then reading this now makes me realize I am not really afraid of the rain, the rain cannot hurt me, the rain is as natural as living and I cannot stop it.

I think, what I'm really afraid of is being alone. Being in the midst of the "bad things happening" and I am alone.
Dont get me wrong though. I am a very independent person. I want things done my way.
But I do admit that at the lowliest times of my life I dont want to be by myself.
I've been there and its not it anyway good. or acceptable.

I am afraid that after I've been my best, given everything, risked all that is at stake and end up all wasted. And with everything to lose, I should survive.

And when you grew up overshadowed by the mistakes you've made over time. It isnt easy living with all those expectations of making up for them. You will always be afraid of making the same mistakes all over again. Or thinking that after all that you've done you'll still fail. And you spent half the time convincing yourself that you are not failure before you start redeeming yourself from being one.

If you are that person, you will be afraid everyday. You will be afraid of the rain. As I am.

Today, I hope it wont rain.
I left my umbrella at home.